If you’re out there and you’re single: Lower your standards. It’s that simple. We all have a skewed perception of ourselves, and that’s okay. It’s okay to be confident in what we have to offer. The issue becomes an issue when you feel “better than” someone or that you deserve way more in a partner than you deserve in actuality.
So how do you know what you deserve? Take the test.
What’s your number (looks-wise) in a scale from one to ten?
If your answer is 8 or above, then you need a major reality check! No one is an 8, or 9 and definitively not 10. Everyone is fucked up one way or another. Some people are visibly fucked up. Others have hidden issues worse than the people with visible problems.
So the first step from getting what you deserve, is to realize that you are nowhere near perfect. You’re a human being like the next human being. Of course there are obvious people that are more attractive than others – but even those people are fucked up.
Take Halle Berry for example. Gorgeous, smart… so why do all her partners end up beating on her, cheating on her or simply leaving her? I don’t have the answer to those questions, but these are the questions to ask yourself when you’re looking for that ideal person. The secret is that no one is ideally perfect.
Lowering your standards seems counter-productive to all the “do your best” speeches we all have heard growing up. That “don’t settle” crap is bull. You need to settle, because believe that the person you are settling for, is also settling for you.
We all want that supermodel person, when in reality those supermodels don’t exist. What you see on television is a mirage. They get paid to portray a certain image. After they get their check they’re just regular people. So get over it.
The best thing to do is to give people a chance to prove themselves based on attitude. If you fall in love with someone’s personality, that love will grow into a deep attraction more intense than any initial physical judgment. Hence, why you see the “ugly guy” with that “pretty girl”.
Now go out there, lower your standards and give somebody some. Anybody. Ladies, twitter me if you need help: @qreyes