NY vs. LA, by Q. Reyes – Artistic Warfare #77

August 22, 2010 Q. Reyes 0 Comments

Been working on Season 2 of Latino 101, and I have to say that I feel extremely fortunate.  We already had captured great people and moments during season one, but now, we have much, much more material to add to the show.

Some of the new additions to the program include Edward James Olmos, Lupe Ontiveros and many other surprises.  Last Comic Standing winner, Felipe Esparza, graced us with his presence once again and we have a ton of new people from the left coast.

I haven’t even been able to write this column in the last couple of weeks because of my New York production trip.  Something happens when I’m in New York that I have no sense of time or just sense, period.

It was good to see old friends and meet new friends, and home cooking at my dad’s place in Brooklyn was never too much.  I always have a good time over there, except for that night that I tried to impersonate MOTU and go into his loft.  That night didn’t end very well.  I don’t know what gave away that I wasn’t MOTU.  I wore a hat that said ‘MOTU’ and I did have a couple of beautiful Asian ladies on my arm.  Not sure what happened. No one bought it.  Except me, cause I still had to pay for the ladies. (I want to thank the NYPD for keeping the handcuffs lose).

Needless to say there was a lot of drinking (by people around me who make me drink) and many conversations with the NY ladies.  Ironically, I met more foreign women in NY than anywhere else.  But, when I did meet some of ‘the locals’, I was able to note many differences in the attitudes between women of the West and East coasts.

For example, NY women are obviously much more aggressive, but, they will give you a chance.  LA women will judge you before you even say a word and shut you down on your way to them.  NY women will at least hear what you have to say, but, if you’re not saying something interesting within the first five seconds, you’re toast, and they will burn and scar you for life.

In LA women are more impressed with status.  In NY women are more impressed with… nothing.  You just better have a plan or you’re doomed.  The good thing is that in NY you can be homeless and still have a chance with the ladies (if you’re game’s good enough).  In LA you couldn’t get a glance from a pretty girl unless you seem to have bathed recently.

Of course, I’m generalizing my observations.  It took me a bit to figure out NY women because a lot of their attitudes vary from where they grew up or live.  You need to know the difference between a girl from Long Island and a girl from the Bronx.  They each require a different kind of attention.  In LA, it’s pretty simple to figure out, she’s either an actress/model or not.  They both could use the same attention.

I grew up in Puerto Rico, and I know island girls are much different than the “mainland” girls.  Island girls are down to earth, and it doesn’t matter how beautiful they are, they will be nice to you, and if you’re smart, you’ll marry one and keep her there.

Southern girls are different, too.  They’re a bit more receptive to bullshit.  Not that they don’t know that it’s bullshit, it’s just they don’t mind.  NY girls hate bullshit, and LA girls will only like bullshit if you’re driving a Mercedes.

Again, these are generalizations based on regions.  In the future I will go more in depth with girls from other countries, especially the third world.  Those are less complicated, and the “I’m from America” line works great.

Okay, next week I’ll resume my articles on seduction, starting with the new topic I’ve been researching: Rejection.

4, 3, 2, 1… criticize me below now!