Don’t You Forget About Me, by Martha Thomases – Brilliant Disguise

September 18, 2010 Martha Thomases 11 Comments

If you’re reading this on Saturday, I have a headache.  I’m not eating.  It’s Yom Kippur, and although I’m not a very observant Jew, I do fast.  I don’t do it because God says so (my concept of God is not so limited), but because it is my way to be grateful about having the choice.

And also, because I’m a drama queen.

Not to play to stereotypes, but you don’t want to get between a Jew and a meal.  I mean, I had a large (if early) dinner last night.  I’ll have a large dinner tonight after the sun sets (or I pull the shades, which is effectively the same thing).  Essentially, I’m skipping two meals.  What’s the big deal?

(Jon Stewart, back in his stand-up days, had a great bit about the difference between Yom Kippur and Lent.  “Even in sin,” he said, “you pay retail.”)

Yom Kippur is not like American New Year.  One does not  use this holiday as an opportunity to make resolutions.  Even with the fasting, this is not the occasion for dieting.  We’re supposed to look back on the year and repent.  More important, we’re supposed to atone.

To atone is not to simply apologize, although that is the first step.  To atone means to make things right.  For example:

• It’s not enough to complain about how stupidly people talk about important issues in this country; you have to support your own opinion with actual facts.

• It’s not enough to complain that Obama isn’t living up to his promise; you have to get out the vote in the mid-terms so there are more progressives on his side.

• It’s not enough to apologize for opposing the Islamic Center in Lower Manhattan; you have to bring a nice casserole when they open (and no pork).

• It’s not enough to acknowledge that Obama is a native-born American citizen; you have to teach an eighth grade geography class.  Correctly.

• It’s not enough to stop nagging one’s offspring about when you’re going to be a grandmother; you have to volunteer at a day-care center.

• It’s not enough to complain about the disgusting M&M pretzel commercial, with its intimations of anal sex and/or cannibalism; you have to boycott the product until the commercials come off the air.

You probably have some suggestions of your own.  Feel free to add them below. I’ll be over here, trying not to think about kasha.

Media Goddess Martha Thomases is going to have a lot to atone for next year, too.