As American As A Kangaroo, by Mike Gold – Brainiac On Banjo #197

November 22, 2010 Mike Gold 0 Comments

Last week Ahmed Ghailani was convicted of conspiring to destroy American embassies in Kenya and Tanzania back in 1998 that killed 224 people, including 12 Americans. It was the first civilian trial of a Guantanamo prisoner.

That’s a victory, right? The bad guy faces 20 years to life in prison. So why are the Republicans and the Tea Baggers and the unassociated right-wingers so angry?

The civilian jury acquitted Ghailani of the other 276 counts of the indictment.

Right-wing glory hound Rep. Peter T. King immediately had a microphone spaz attack. “This tragic verdict demonstrates the absolute insanity of the Obama administration’s decision to try Al Qaeda terrorists in civilian courts” and “a total miscarriage of justice… It shows how totally wrong the Obama administration is to bring a case like this to civilian court. He was acquitted of 224 counts of murder.”

Say what? The dude had a fair trial, the prosecution failed to make its case in 276 on 277 counts, the jury sat there and, unlike King and his fellow travelers, listened to all the testimony and arguments and saw all the evidence, and after deliberation they came to a verdict. Anti-American voles like King – which run into the millions – didn’t like the results of due process of law and now advocate abandoning our nation’s laws in favor of kangaroo courts. They like the idea of turning our military into such a court as they are not bound by due process.

In case you’re not familiar with the term, a kangaroo court is “an unofficial court held by a group of people in order to try someone regarded, especially without good evidence, as guilty of a crime or misdemeanor.” If you know in your heart of hearts that a person is guilty, why bother with the Constitution? Just shoot the bastard, perhaps on Dancing With The Stars. Tom Bergeron could hand the gun to Bristol Palin who, with great emotion, passes it off to her mother with the instruction to shoot Ahmed Ghailani and not Levi Johnston.

“Ah,” you might say, “But we’re in a war. A war on terror. This belongs in a military court.” Right. Don’t we have a war on drugs going on? Did you catch your 16 year-old daughter with marijuana in her underwear drawer? Shoot her!

A war on concept is no different than a war on color: let’s agree the color orange is evil and shoot anybody eating the wrong type of fruit.

We don’t have to play by our own rules; it’s our nation and if we want to change its legal system to that of the Soviet Union, well, that’s fine with an ever-increasing number of Americans.

Okay, but please, stop teaching civics in school. Those classes turn our children into socialist sympathizers who respect our laws instead of genuine Americans.

Disclaimer: Tom Bergeron is a personal friend of MichaelDavisWorld’s own Michael Davis; I know because MOTU introduced me to him. Ergo, one should not infer I thought Bergeron would actually participate in a blatant act of murder on live television, even if it is during Sweeps.

Fellow-traveler, anarcho-syndicalist and www.ComicMix.com editor-in-Chief Mike Gold performs the weekly two-hour Weird Sounds Inside The Gold Mind ass-kicking bizarro music and blather radio show on America’s pop culture channel The Point, www.getthepointradio.com, every Sunday at 7:00 PM Eastern, replayed three times during the week (check the website above for times). Likewise, his Weird Scenes Inside The Gold Mind political and cultural rants pop up each and every day at the same venue.