Entitlements, by Whitney Farmer – Un Pop Culture

March 3, 2011 Whitney Farmer 0 Comments

Whitney runs a rock music venue on the beach in L.A. She has an M.B.A, and finally has internet at home again.

During the show on Friday night, our production supervisor for the main stage tracked me down as I was coming back from checking in on our other show on our other smaller stage. He had been approached by a very upset customer who needed to speak with someone in charge immediately.

I came in concerned because it must have been important to pull the production head of a show off-line while a band was on stage to address a problem. Rather than a real crisis, however, what I encountered was a guy from the Hamptons with a ponytail.

Apparently, he wanted to impress an actor from “The Social Network” by throwing enough money down to buy a VIP booth out from under customers who were already comfortably settled in. Our server asked the seated group if they would be willing to vacate the both and be moved to our VIP room instead. They declined, and she informed the guy with the ponytail. This is when he went ballistic. When I came face-to-face with him, I began to try and understand what had occurred, and then I tried to understand what was his side of the story and what he needed to be happy so that we could get whatever was broken fixed. I’ll admit that I was confused while he was talking with me. That he should expect us to treat other customers so poorly on his behalf didn’t make sense. I couldn’t quite believe what he was expecting us to do. I had already set aside space in the VIP room for him prior to doors. I even had a sign posted. But he wanted someone else’s place instead.

Once before, a similar but very polite request had been issued to us. Leon Russell was performing, and it was right before the announcement about his new collaboration with Elton John. A group consisting of Cameron Crowe, T. Bone Burnett, and executives from Rolling Stone magazine wanted to buy out a VIP section that was already committed. HOWEVER, we got permission from the first clients before we made the move, and the new VIPs generously compensated the groups that we shifted. Plus, they had a great story to tell their friends the next day at work…’I got bumped by Rolling Stone and the husband of the hot chick from Heart…’

I’ll admit that on Friday there were things that I could have done. But then The Ponytail said, “The problem with this place is you can’t spot who’s able to spend a lot of money. It’s not her fault (our server). She just hasn’t had a strong man like me to manage her.” Then he leaned forward and kissed me.

Earlier in the night, I had begun to spike a fever. I hoped that there were enough contagious microbes on my cheek to run past his lips and down his throat before settling destructively in his lungs. But the one thing I was certain about is that I wasn’t going to do anything he wanted. To quote Ed Helms in Cedar Rapids that I got to preview at a screening at Soho House recently when I was in NYC, “I don’t trust anyone with a ponytail.”

It is disingenuous to label the most vulnerable in society with ‘entitled’. And it is morally troubling when this politically charged title is used as a justification to shift resources in a manner that can exacerbate social ills. The push-back against collective bargaining comes to mind. True, job protection based on seniority or tenure can lead to problems in both quality and productivity. Our broken education system nakedly displays this. But the reason that these issues have been imbedded in union negotiations was because of ethically insupportable actions against workers in past times, such as ageism or churn-and-burn hiring practices which replace more experienced workers in favor of newer and cheaper labor. It is stunning to see teachers characterized as if they are robber barons for their fierce insistence that their contracts be honored.

The most demanding devourers of resources are ironically those who have too much already. They are the ones who haven’t felt a hunger pang recently unless it’s on purpose. They are the ones that have tantrums long after puberty. They are the ones that we know will come to certain shows at the club, when we staff extra and when I prep our crew for ridiculous drink orders and getting shorted on tips no matter how good they do their jobs.

The issue that is being faced over entitlements in this country is not one of politics. It is instead one of manners and morals. There is art and power in saying ‘No’. It is crucial that we say it to the ones who need to hear it.

Quote of the Blog, from Rob Farmer, my dad, who recently learned about a new hair straightening technique that is fashionable in So Cal, but differentiating it from another female grooming technique that is also popular here: “So, Whitney…your sister just got a Brazilian. The other kind.”