Friends and Family, by Mike Gold
April 18, 2012 Mike Gold 1 Comment
This is not a good day for any of us here in the Michael Davis World family.
Back in the late 1970s, I was editing a home video consumer magazine called Video Action. Amusingly, I staffed the publication with freelancers from the comic book community – people who excelled in the art of visual communications and popular culture. It wasn’t long before I received a letter from Martha Thomases and John Tebbel inquiring about writing opportunities. They presented their pedigrees and cited a whole bunch of mutual friends as references. They could have stopped at Denny O’Neil and Larry Hama.
John and Martha quickly became good friends. Somewhere along the way, they had a son they named Arthur, who, as kids will do, grew up and became a smart, clever adult. There isn’t enough bandwidth in all of Apple’s clouds for me to detail the nature of that friendship and divine the depth of the love I have for them, so instead I’ll focus on one element. There is nothing I value more than brilliant conversation with good friends. It takes wit, intelligence, experience and personality to pull it off on an ongoing basis, and I would swim upstream in piranha-infested waters to spend a few hours with these two.
A few months ago, the three of us met for a wonderful meal at a midtown Manhattan steakhouse. The three of us arrived separately, and John and I arrived early. We got into a deep conversation about how much the James Bond novels meant to us as kids but, upon later reflection, how Ian Fleming was a genuinely crappy writer and what the hell did JFK see in him anyway? By the time Martha arrived we had moved on to our favorite topic, the genius of Jack Benny and his stylistic influence over the next two generations of comedians (Benny begat Carson, Carson begat Maher). When we were seated, we moved on to an array of topics. This was typical for our dinners, but because we had that time before Martha arrived it was, for me at least, an important bonding event. We left vowing to get together again soon.
Several days later – it might have been longer; right now it seems like moments later – Martha called to tell me John was in the hospital after significant medical trauma at home. In short order, we learned he had lung cancer.
John appreciated the irony of having a particularly nasty form of lung cancer despite his lack of an addiction to tobacco. Martha showed more strength in spirit and in love than one could imagine, but none of us were surprised in the least.
You know this story doesn’t end well. John died yesterday. And that, folks, sucks.
Martha’s birthday is tomorrow. Their friends are gathering this weekend to be with her; we were planning on that anyway when we all knew John was in dire straits. It’s a lousy way to celebrate her birthday, but her essence is beautiful and she’s one of the most grounded people in Manhattan. By and large you do not cope with the death of our closest loved ones, but eventually you accept and understand you are surrounded by the love and support of your friends and family.
We have lost a member of our family this week, and we grieve as we celebrate John’s wit, intelligence, experience and personality. Our hearts go out to Martha and to Arthur, and I know I speak for us all in offering our love eternal.
– Mike Gold
(This piece, in a somewhat different form, also appears on ComicMix.com in place of my weekly column. We were fortunate that John commented at both forums; we are fortunate that Martha and Arthur will be continuing their work in the very near future.)
Elayne Riggs
April 18, 2012 - 6:18 am
Thanks for your wonderful memories of John and a very well written tribute, Mike. I’m very saddened that he will no longer be with us, and I’m crying all over again at the realization that John passed so soon before Martha’s birthday. (As it happens, my dad died the day before my mom’s birthday, so I know what an emotional roller coaster that can be.)
Marc Alan Fishman
April 18, 2012 - 9:04 am
In the darkest days, it’s hardest to find the light. The loss of John is a terrible one. Sad to say I never had the opportunity to meet the man. Suffice to say, even without knowing him, I am saddened just the same. Martha knows we’ll be there for her… and should she ever be in this neck of the woods, there’s a hearty hug awaitin’.
David Quinn
April 18, 2012 - 10:04 am
Love and positive thoughts for Martha and all who loved John. He reached many people.
Reg
April 18, 2012 - 3:23 pm
So very sorry to read this. Sending thoughts of love to Martha and Art…and to the rest of the family and friends. Very much including you, Mike.
Marifran O'Neil
April 18, 2012 - 3:57 pm
You said it beautifully,Mike. We will all miss John and our thoughts and sympathy go our to Martha and Arthur. Wish we could do more.
Pennie
April 18, 2012 - 5:31 pm
So long ago and far away from right now, Martha and John came to visit in Las Vegas. I got them a decent room and private cabana by the Palms pool and we enjoyed the fruits of Sin City for a time–some of which I was more than fairly acquainted with after years of exploration. One of the highlights was taking John to a craps table. It was something to behold as I attempted to explain the game, it’s intricacies and nuances to a real smart guy. “What the hell is a hopping seven?” “Who plays this?”
I so miss our long discurses on the human race and its frailties.
I miss John already.
Martha, you’re nothing short of amazing. And Arthur, the apple doesn’t fall too far.
Bill Mulligan
April 18, 2012 - 6:52 pm
Terrible news. My deepest condolences to Martha, Arthur and all of John’s friends.
Whitney
April 19, 2012 - 1:02 am
Oh no…Martha and Art, we are all so sorry for your loss. Please know that we love you.