Cold As Ice, by Michael Davis – Straight No Chaser #311 | @MDWorld

May 18, 2013 Michael Davis 4 Comments

Try as I might, I cannot maintain my blissful disposition all the time. I’m a happy chap more times than not, and that’s how I like it.

I endeavor most days to bring a smile to those around me, especially people I consider friends.

I’ve learned to keep my circle of friends small. I don’t have many people who are in my “inner circle,” and those who are really get the most loyal, understanding friend there is.

I’m a great friend. Really, I am.

But I can only take so much drama, no matter who you are and what you mean to me. I have a dear friend who I thought would be in my life forever.  After a series of really bad disagreements, I realized that having that person around has been more toxic than healthy.

I admit I can be pill. I’ve been known to stick to my guns, regardless of logic or facts.

I am who I am.

That said — I allow people their demons. When said demons continue to cause me pain, I forgive them often, most times with love and hopefully understanding.

I tell people upfront where I stand on life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Some people get it, some don’t. Those who don’t never become close to me.

If a friend of mine tells me they now worship Satan — I’d say, “Good luck with that” and be gone. I NEVER stick around people who actively engage in behavior I find iniquitous or agree to do things I don’t want to do.

Guilt trips don’t work on me either. If asked to go see a film I don’t want to see, I’m not going. Period.

“I’d go with you to see a film I didn’t want to see,” She said with big puppy dog eyes.  “I wouldn’t ask you to,” I said, then added, “Anyone ever tell you have eyes like a dog?”

Fuck being noble.

But — lets say some drop-dead gorgeous Asian woman invited me to see a movie I did not want to see. If I decided to be noble (on the off chance after the movie we play “love you long time”) she would never know I wanted to scream, OH FUCK THIS SUCKS, while screening whatever fucking art film she dragged me to. No, I wouldn’t pout or complain, nor would I gloat if by chance she hated it also. I’d SUCK it up and try at least to have a good time…long time.

People who agree to something they didn’t want to do, then BITCH the entire time, are just fucking morons.

What never fails to amaze and piss me off is when someone tells me they are OK with something, when it’s actually a problem for them. As an example, lets say your wife asks if you mind if your mother-in law came to stay for a month. If you mind, then say you do. That does not mean she won’t come, but your wife knows how you feel. When your mother-in law gets there and crashes your computer, the very same computer you told her she couldn’t use, then you have a right to be EXTRA pissed.

EXTRA pissed because she fucked up your computer AND your wife is well aware you did not want her there.

BUT…

If you co-sign on a visit and give permission to mother-in law to use your computer, then you have NO right to be pissed. YOU agreed to something you did not want to, so suck it the fuck up.

No one has the right to object to however the fuck you live your life. If someone objects to something in your life, they do have the right to decide whether or not they want to deal with you.

It burns me to no end when you are upfront with someone about something, anything, whether it’s something trivial, like you prefer paper to plastic at the supermarket, or something significant, like you hate your mother or something secretive, like you enjoy stuffing gerbils up your ass.

If the person you share this information with is cool when the subject is first broached, they do NOT get to bitch at you later.  This is a particular problem with some women when you first start dating them.

I’m sure it’s a problem with men also, but as I don’t date men I could give a fuck.

But that won’t stop me from using my manly self as another example. ME, I do give a fuck about.

I once dated a woman with two kids. She told me I would not get to meet them unless she was sure I was going to be in her life on a serious basis. Her reason —  she did not want her kids to become vested in me, only for me to leave..

I got that, and told her I respected it.

3 months later I didn’t get it. “I still have not met your kids, it’s been three months,” I said. “It’s too soon,” she said. “It’s been three months!” I countered.

This went on for a while until she got up and walked out of the restaurant. I thought she went to the bathroom — nope, she went home. When I finally realized she wasn’t in the bathroom and had left, I called her.

She explained to me quite clearly and cold as ice, “YOUR time limit doesn’t matter when it comes to my kids.” With that she hung up, and that, as they say, was that.

Like I said, cold as ice.

Fuck her I thought. Some time later I felt extra shitty. EXTRA shitty because I agreed to wait, then tried convincing her she was in the wrong.

I have a friend that continues to question my evaluation on a matter I thought I had their support on. After years of friendship, it’s gotten to a point where it’s not just the elephant in the room, it’s Tarzan and the fucking elephants in the fucking room.

So be it.

I don’t have many real friends, and losing one is never easy, but neither is pimping.

Such is life, I’ll survive.