LAX-Tremely Disappointed, by Arthur Tebbel – Pop Art #228 | @MDWorld

October 17, 2013 Arthur Tebbel 0 Comments

Friends, I come to you this week not as an advisor but as a traveler.  I am on the road this week and, as far as the writing of this column is concerned last week as well.  I’ve lived in LA for over five years now but I still very much consider New York City my home.  I travel there frequently and I would just like to share with you the myriad ways it has become absolutely the worst thing in all of creation.

I want you to know how fantastic this used to be.  There used to be three flights a day in both directions between Bob Hope airport in Burbank and JFK in New York.  This is important because Bob Hope is a fantastic airport and LAX is the nexus point of all human suffering.  I was once on a security line at LAX that went outside the building and started winding around the terminal.  That happened during a time the government wasn’t furloughing employees.  The Burbank airport is like having your own private plane.  You can be from the curb to your gate in 15 minutes including a stop for a snack as long as it isn’t Friday night.

Service has been cut down to one flight a day each way from Burbank to New York.  The eastbound flight is a red eye, which is not a problem for me I love red eyes.  What I don’t like is how the fragility of the new schedule means the last two flights have been seriously delayed.  Getting in to New York around 5:30am is fantastic; getting in at 7 is a rush hour disaster.  The return flights are no better.  I’m trying to fly from the biggest city in the country to the second biggest and was basically only offered flights that left first thing in the morning or after dark.  Are airports even open from 10-6?  Is this a big scam that everyone knows about and I’m just discovering?

I know that on the surface this feels like I’m complaining about a very first world problem.  My transcontinental travel at a relatively reasonable price is slightly inconvenient but it’s getting worse and the only explanation I can come up with is that it’s getting worse because the people who run the airlines think they can get away with it.  Well that explains the delays and long lines; the diminished service is probably an expression of supply and demand.  I’m not the first person to say any of this (in fact I’m beginning to suspect I sound like Andy Rooney) but can’t we be at the “mad as hell and not going to take it anymore” portion of our collective national outrage?