Hanging on the Telephone, by Martha Thomases – Brilliant Disguise | @MDWorld

January 4, 2014 Martha Thomases 1 Comment

This might be kind of scattered.  I’m on hold.  Again.

A rational person wouldn’t try to write and talk on the telephone at the same time.  And I’m not planning to talk and write at the same time.  However, I’ve been on hold a very long time.  If I ever have to sign up for health insurance again, I won’t do it so close to my deadline.

This is not a screed against the Affordable Care Act.  I’m not crazy about it, for a lot of reasons (some of them articulated quite well here.  But I think it’s a step in the right direction (towards quality health care for all), so I’m trying to be a good citizen about it.

For ten minutes, I’ve listened to them tell me how important my call is to them, and how someone will be with me shortly.  I’d like it better if they just kept playing the crappy hold music.

In September, I received a notification from my insurance company that they were canceling t he policy I had because it wasn’t compliant with the new law.  They said I would be automatically enrolled in a policy that was legal.  However, it seemed to me that the great thing about the ACA was that would no longer pay a penalty for being a self-employed person, and I might be able to get a better policy for just a little bit more money.  I called my doctors’ office, asking what insurance worked best for them.  They said it made no difference, that they would accept policies from all the major companies.  I signed up easily enough on the New York State exchange at the end of October, putting in my doctors’ names and the kind of policy I wanted.

You would think that would be all I needed to do.  And you’d be wrong.

The Friday before Christmas, at five o’clock, I got an e-mail from my doctors saying that they weren’t accepting any of the insurance companies on the exchange.  I went and looked at their website, and it still listed the company I’d selected as one they took, but apparently there are all kinds of networks and wrinkles that go beyond simple company names.

Who programs hold music?  Is it a job like being a DJ?  Should it be?

So, logically, the next step was to call the insurance company.  I was also worried because I hadn’t received a bill yet for my new policy (although I was paid up on my previous policy with them).  They advised me to call my doctors, see if they would accept other insurance from them that is not part of the exchange.  Such a plan would cost an extra $50 a month for the same coverage.

In the middle of this, my cable and Internet went out.  And I got a bill for two different policies.  And then there was a holiday.

Hold on.  I think I’m getting put through to a human.

Okay, I talked to the very nice man who isn’t personally responsible for keeping me on hold.  The way to get around having two policies, he said, is to pay for one of them.  My doctors’ office says the insurance company’s network limits the doctors who can participate, and they will not be.

What is most likely is that some doctors will accept a payment schedule that works for the insurance companies, and some won’t.  It’s all about the money.  Quel surprise!

None of my problems were the fault of the Affordable Care Act, although the implementation of the law is what triggered them.  All would be fixed in an instant if we had single-payer health care, or at least a public  option.  Thanks, Joe Lieberman.

A lazy person would blame Obama.  A more engaged person would still blame Obama, for not trying harder to pass a more comprehensive law.

This person simply hopes to be lucky enough to stay healthy while finding a new primary care physician.  And perhaps trying to get more Jonathan Richman music on the telephone.

Media Goddess Martha Thomases needs affection.