Fit to Print, by Arthur Tebbel & Chris Toia – Pop Art… and Chris #34

July 28, 2009 Arthur Tebbel & Chris Toia 5 Comments

Dear Art and Chris,
This week I was named the, “Most Trustworthy Newsman in America” by an online poll conducted by Times Magazine. What the Fuck?

– Jon Stewart, Host Comedy Central’s “The Daily Show”

Jon,
We’re sometimes regarded as cynical people, and this poll does little to restore our faith in the state of tele-journalism, but even we have to admit it could have gone worse. It could have been Perez Hilton, of course on the other end of the spectrum the creators of the internet sensation “PopArt… and Chris” weren’t even an option.
   

Here’s what we don’t understand. If you’re considered a newsman, what is it exactly that you’re satirizing on your show? We realize the context of this survey was establishing the most trusted newsman now that Walter Cronkite will no longer be letting us know the way it is. Cronkite was famous for his tireless professionalism, he wouldn’t go on air with a story unless his team had fact checked and sourced the material to his satisfaction. He seldom editorialized the news he presented. On the rare occasions when Cronkite offered his opinion on the news it carried incredible weight and gravitas. Jon, you also have a team of people working tirelessly, but their job isn’t to uncover and vet fresh news. Instead nightly you present the same news, that mainstream media is filled with hypocrisy and sometimes outright lies. We guess it’s all very modern and meta that the most trusted newsman in America doesn’t present the news, he comments on the way the news is presented.

Jon, our greatest concern is that Americans no longer see the difference between news and editorials, education and entertainment. We certainly respect the level of integrity you’ve tried to maintain through the years and there’s certainly honesty in comedy. However honesty is not necessarily the same thing as fact. Newsmen are supposed to report the facts. Unfortunately mainstream news outlets are no longer in the business of facts. Until newsman feel like reporting facts again, we’ll have to accept that the most trustworthy people in the news are the one’s that are in on the joke.

Dear Art & Chris,
I have a pretty sweet gig, mayor of the ninth-biggest city in the greatest country on earth. More that that once a year the attention of the entire pop-culture loving world is focused on my city as Comic-Con International brings hundreds of thousands of people to town to celebrate all things geeky. Why don’t I get more props?
Jerry Sanders, Mayor, San Diego CA

Jerry,
Fuck you. Your city is like a minefield of shit for 5 days. It could not be clearer that no one in the government of that city gives a shit about the people who have come to spend money on hotels and meals for several days.

You let them do roadwork on the road leading to the convention center during the convention. This led to the shuttle buses taking 45 minutes to get a mile. It’s not as if this convention is some sort of surprise perpetrated on your unsuspecting city by a malevolent comics industry. You don’t think that road work could have been put off for another week or two so that it wouldn’t be an issue for 120,000 extra people?

We know the real reason you don’t make your city run better. Why you don’t do something to regulate the swarms of Pedi cabs (one of which recently killed someone) or tone down your police force (Art saw a dude arrested for jaywalking) for the crush of Comic-Con. You know as well as anyone else that the attendees won’t do shit about it. They’re a group of meek individuals that will never demand anything better. How else can you explain the huge amounts of money the shell out in tickets, hotel, and airfare just to get out there and be treated like very stupid cattle for 5 days. This is a demographic you know you can treat like shit with no repercussions, knowledge also held by the studios that make content for them.