Happy Holidays Nigger. A Christmas Story, by Michael Davis – Straight No Chaser #245
December 2, 2011 Michael Davis 5 Comments
I
LOVE
Christmas.
If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a million times.
I love Christmas.
A million and one.
Hey, pay no attention to the harsh title of this piece. This IS a Christmas story and it’s filled with happiness and good cheer.
Trust me, I’m a doctor.
Out story begins in Las Vegas where I met my mom on Thanksgiving Day.
My mom LOVES Vegas.
Me? Well, I LOVE Christmas!
…and two.
The plan was to see some sights, take in a show or two, eat at fine restaurants and have her lose my inheritance playing slots.
That was the plan and it came off like a charm. What a wonderful way to spend Thanksgiving and kick off the official start of the Christmas season.
I LOVE Christmas!
…and three.
My long time readers know I hate to fly almost as much as I love Christmas (and four) so I was not looking forward to the flight back to L.A. even if it was only a 40-minute flight.
Whenever I can I drive to my destination I will because I hate to fly so much.
If it were not the holiday weekend I would have driven the 4-5 hours to Vegas. People tell me it’s a waste of time and I should just fly to places like San Diego, San Francisco and Vegas. All are between a 1 and 5-hour drive away.
WHAT is up with that?
So what if it was only a short distance away? If I’m crossing MY street in FRONT of MY house and a truck strikes me and kills me I’m STILL dead.
“He was right in front of his house, such a pity.”
Would it NOT be such a pity if I were killed miles away on the freeway?
It would be to me.
An airplane falling from the sky 35 minutes into a 40-minute flight would bring me no solace as I scream like a little bitch while damning the person who said to me; “It’s a short flight, it will be over before you know it.”
Anywho, the flight back from Vegas was uneventful (thankyouJesus) and when I landed, I was happy in the knowledge that my car was parked at a home from which I took a cab. That way I avoided paying the 30 bucks a day for airport parking and the cab fare was less than 10 bucks to return to where the car was parked.
Smart eh?
I thought so. My cab driver? Not so much.
My cab driver was not happy with picking up a holiday fare from the airport, which was a hop, skip, and a jump from the destination.
He said; “You could have walked here.”
I let that go.
When he got out of the cab to open the trunk where my luggage was he said; “Fucking monkey, wasting my time.”
THAT, I didn’t let go.
“What did you say?”
Instead of answering he insisted very loudly, that I stand back so he could open the trunk.
WHAT THE FUCK?
I’ve seen a few hundred thousand car trunk openings in my life and I’m PRETTY DARN sure that I know where to stand. I realized that he didn’t care where I stood he was just trying to avoid repeating calling me a ‘monkey’.
Now I was PISSED.
Then something hit me.
Calm.
Tranquility.
Peace.
I’m a little ahead of myself I did achieve calm, tranquility and peace after I let the cabbie know just how I felt about being called a monkey.
THEN he called me a “fucking nigger.”
Ouch.
So-where do I go from there?
Do I:
- React in such a way that would surely escalate the situation?
- Let it go.
- Bust a cap in his ass, which would surely land me in jail.
Once, a ex-girlfriend, at a party, had to pull me off a guy I was hammering with two fists because he called her an ‘Ho.’
I didn’t even like her that much. It was the principal of the thing.
Regarding being called a ‘fucking nigger’; at one time in my life there would have been NO other option than A or C.
But, I’m NOT that guy anymore.
I let it go.
I’m not spending the holidays in jail because some motherfucker is unhappy with his lot in life. I’m spending the holidays sitting in my office writing books or in my studio painting. When the time comes I’ll be spending the holidays with friends and family.
I think I received an early Christmas gift-I’m no longer the guy who has to crush someone if they offend me. To me that indeed is a gift.
THEY don’t matter.
My mother, family and my friends matter.
I matter Mr. Cab Driver you don’t.
Have a good holiday Mr. Cab Driver, peace to you and your family.
Sorry about the tip.
R. Maheras
December 2, 2011 - 10:37 am
Geez, what is this? 1965 in Mississippi?
Since I cab a bit in LA, I can only assume the guy was a relatively new and unassimilated émigré from some Eastern European country or the Middle East, where, sociologically, things are still so backward they’d even make an old-timer like Pat Robertson wince. I’ve traveled extensively abroad, and as I’ve pointed out a few times in other threads, race relations and equality in many countries overseas makes U.S. progress — despite its problems — seem absolutely stellar.
But is the above isn’t the root cause, then it’s a red flag that things here are regressing rather than progressing. I pray that isn’t the case.
R. Maheras
December 2, 2011 - 10:38 am
Oh, yeah… Happy Holidays (with no qualifier)!
MOTU
December 2, 2011 - 11:28 am
I intentionally jw
MOTU
December 2, 2011 - 11:36 am
On my post above, I hit the submit button by accident…
R. wrote:”Since I cab a bit in LA, I can only assume the guy was a relatively new and unassimilated émigré from some Eastern European country or the Middle East,”
I intentionally did not mention the race of the person.
Then it would have been about that. Stupidity and ignorance are pretty universal,unfortunately.
MOTU
December 2, 2011 - 11:37 am
R,
AND thank you for the holiday wishes! My best to you and yours my friend!
Steve
December 2, 2011 - 12:36 pm
You are a much more cool and collected dude than me, Mike. While I’ve calmed somewhat over the years since high school, I still have a switch that is easily switched ON in some instances. About 7 years ago, shortly before my divorce, (go figure), I was out with my now ex, TRYING to just get out and have a little fun. At a Japanese restaurant of all places, I got into it with a drunken redneck and his skanky ho. I’ll spare you the detail,s other than to say, I took a deep breathe and was ready to let it go. I turned to walk back to our table when my ex commented to the guy how lucky he was that I WAS letting it go. He responded ‘F— you, bitch’. BIG MISTAKE. Before the word ‘bitch’ was fully out his mouth, he’d been head butted, spreading his nose from ear to ear, smashed into the wall, body slammed to the ground, and was pummelled severely, by the time I was pulled off of him. Had I been a man of color, such as yourself, and had been spoken to in the manner you’d been spoken to by the moron in the cab, if he was lucky, all that would have come of it would have been that the docs at the ER would have had to surgically remove the door of the cab from his rectum……
Larry White
December 2, 2011 - 1:02 pm
This site always amazes me. Good for you Motu. Well done!
MOTU
December 2, 2011 - 2:15 pm
Steve,
I’ve reacted to more than a few racial incidents with, lets just say, anger and leave it at that.
My new reality is to try and walk away when the situation is simply stupid. The cabbie was just stupid and escalating that situation could very easily has tuned out really badly.
That, in no way means I won’t call a spade a spade (pun intended) and react accordingly given just how severe the offense was.
I’m sure when all is said and done and the cabbie is called into his bosses office because he choose to screw with a African American who happens to write a mean ass complaint letter, he will regret his actions.
Doug Abramson
December 2, 2011 - 2:36 pm
Mean ass complaint letter? I’d been on the cell phone to the company before the asshole drove away!
MOTU
December 2, 2011 - 5:32 pm
Doug,
I REALLY needed to calm down and a well thought out letter copied to my lawyer and The LA Times would NOT have been the result of me reacting immediately.
Doug Abramson
December 2, 2011 - 9:43 pm
MOTU, you’re a better man, than I.
MOTU
December 3, 2011 - 12:34 am
Doug,
I doubt that my friend.
JosephW
December 3, 2011 - 1:27 pm
R Maheras wrote “Geez, what is this? 1965 in Mississippi?”
Wow. Way to ignore all the nasty racism that pervaded Northern states for much of the history of this country–from the 17th century all the way through to the present day. Yeah. Just limit it to something that ONLY happened in the Deep South.
Mike Gold
December 3, 2011 - 6:33 pm
Ummm… RUss didn’t say that this shit didn’t happen anywhere but Mississippi or at any time other than 1965, nor is Mississippi the entire deep south. And MOTU didn’t say all cab drivers in Los Angeles are bigots. Mississippi 1965 is a short and direct reference to a type of environment. He just as easily could have said Howard Beach New York City 1986, but fewer people would have gotten the point.
Mike Gold
December 3, 2011 - 6:34 pm
Oh, and MOTU: we’re you actually fucking when he called you a fucking nigger? I mean, that would have been a mitigating factor.
Steve Atkins
December 3, 2011 - 10:34 pm
*singing* “Mississippi in the middle of a cab ride….”
Isn’t odd that the song I am singing that too is titled “Black Velvet”?
Think of it like in MISSISSIPPI BURNING: The FBI had Lex Luthor, The Green Goblin, and Jigsaw. The opposition had the voice of Chucky from CHILD’S PLAY, Ned the annoying insurance agent from GROUNDHOG’S DAY, and the fat guy from Hee Haw.
R. Maheras
December 4, 2011 - 2:41 pm
JosephW — Great knee-jerk response, based on your preconceptions, and not the evidence.
As Mike infers, I’ve routinely been one of the biggest critics of pervasive racism in northern (often Democratic) bastions like Chicago — which is why I don’t think any voter should be aligned with any particular party. If “your” party knows you will vote for them regardless of how you or your particular interests are handled/mishandled (sometimes over more than a half-century), you’ve lost any leverage you had as an individual voter.
In short, I think the two-party system sucks!
George Haberberger
December 5, 2011 - 9:50 am
MOTU, Your self-control is admirable. I don’t know that I would have been able to let that go if I were in similar circumstances.
Merry Christmas to you and everyone here.
MOTU
December 5, 2011 - 1:05 pm
George,
Over the years I have not been known by my self control. In fact there are some times when I wish I had executed better self control and other times when I’m glad I didn’t.
In this situation reacting any other way would have ended badly I’m 99% sure of that.There really was no up side for me and the down side may have landed him me jail and him in the E.R. OR me in jail and him with a lawsuit OR me in jail and him in a coma.
I’m way to hot to go to jail.
The letter I wrote and the follow up phone call from my attorney has already resulted in the cabbie being called out by his company for his actions.
Nothing says ‘take this seriously’ like a letter from your lawyer, copied to The L.A. Times.
R. Maheras
December 5, 2011 - 3:39 pm
MOTU — I think you handled it all quite effectively.
And, hopefully, it was a useful “learning moment” for the cabbie.