Finishing the Hat, by Martha Thomases – Brilliant Disguise

December 17, 2011 Martha Thomases 16 Comments

It’s that time when those of us who participate in Western Civilization are particularly frantic.  Old Navy stores are staying open around the clock until Christmas.  Walking across 34th Street, as I do several times a week, is like trying to avoid land mines as multitudes of shoppers schlep from store to store, loaded down with bags.  From the news, I infer that those of you who don’t live near 34th Street face a similar trial when you try to pick up something quickly at your local retail hub.

Knitters get frantic too, but within a smaller radius.  For us, the challenge is to finish the projects we started for everyone on our list.  Sure, I can make a hat in two days or less, but what happens when I have to make a dozen hats?  What do you mean, I should have started in September?

Bah, humbug.

Last year, I planned a lovely holiday season.  I would volunteer at the hospital, and go to the movies every day.  Perhaps, to keep the tradition alive, I’d eat Chinese food afterwards.  Then my father fell ill, and all my plans went to shit.

It was an honor to take care of him those last weeks, and I’m grateful for the opportunity, but it was also horrible.  The sun shone brightly every day in Florida, and it felt not one whit like the winter solstice.  The hospital was dreary.  Instead of jingle bells, there were the beeps from the medical monitors.

I learned my lesson.  My plans this year are less ambitious.  I’m not madly knitting gifts for my nieces and nephews, my friends and colleagues.  For previous holidays, I’ve made them everything I can make quickly without needing measurements.   

IfI tried to do that this year, instead of feeling kind and generous, I would feel guilty and resentful.  I’d much rather make individual gifts for individual occasions.  I’d much rather surprise you than disappoint you (I can, however, do both at the same time.  It’s a rare talent).

My gift list this year is pretty small.  If we’re not sleeping together, or if I didn’t give birth to you, or you’re not part of a medical team, you’re not getting a gift.  To be fair, if you don’t meet the first pair of those qualifications, I don’t expect a gift from you. 

Instead, if you were thinking about getting me something, my gift for you is time.  I’m giving you the time you would have spent thinking about what I want, finding it, and sending it to me.  Maybe this is ten minutes, or maybe it’s an afternoon.  Do something for yourself instead.  Take a walk, eat some chocolate, get a massage.  

And may your days be merry, and bright.

Martha Thomases, Media Goddess, will be glad to see the days getting longer again.